Pain.

Some many artists claim that they channel their pain through their songs, books, writings and create a positive outcome with it. You can find yourself in their creations, say to yourself that they interpret your emotions. This sharing can also bring relief. The relief for both the artist that he/she is being understood and the listener, reader that someone else is sharing their emotions.

There are also other people who enjoy the misery and carry pain inside. That's a choice and who am I to judge.

As much as I appreciate the state of being (interaction between the artists and their listener/reader), I am more curious about what happens to other people when they cannot channel their pain this way.

It is claimed by many scientists that human animals are inherently social. Everything that I wrote here supports the hypothesis. And I think that if you have read the writing until this part, you agree with me because somehow you can relate to it.

Have you ever thought of the pain of an autistic kid that went unrecognised? He is going through life trying to form social bonds without having no clues as to how others feel and think. Now who is to say that each and every one of us do not have such a pain buried inside but afraid to share.

It is called vulnerability.

Is your survival index costing you your freedom?

Some of the concepts in life seems very easy to understand. Take 'wanting' into account, it takes thought and action. If you already want something, you are motivated to do it anyway.

Most of the times, except the major changes in your life, that motivation to do the wildest things you want to do in life declines because daily life requires you to do mundane things just to survive. -If you think about it, you need money, to eat, have a shelter, cover yourself with clothes, furniture, travel, and the list goes on. Basic needs can depend on your socioeconomic status- So survival does not mean just breathing, eating, having sex anymore because we adapted our lives with different cultures all over the world. And this survival is everything but basic needs now.

I return back to the concept of wanting. How have you adapted your life to repress your most inner cravings in order to survive in your daily life? Maybe you have hidden yourself because you fear experiencing something bitter? Cause simply, not many people escape happiness and joy.

Are you really sure that all you want is to survive?

Pain versus Hunger

I get it now.

All those times that I felt pain were the most precious gifts of life. 
Think about it, what does pain do to you? Imagine it as a physical reality. When you are wounded, you start looking for help and try to find something to cure the wound.

What do you do when you are hungry? How do you pleasure yourself with food when you are reasonably hungry -as if you know that you have the money for dinner when you are eating lunch-?

Now try to look at it from an emotional perspective. Pain makes you search for deeper questions about yourself and about existence, if you are clever enough and if you have not been abused and manipulated by the mass media productions which mainly say that romantic love is all that you can get, you will find an endless love in the end but somehow you will not be together and cry that you both love each other but cannot be together because of socio-economical or  class related or I don't know-whatever-bullshit-was-presented related topics. But, that is possible for the questioning mind to understand that that is not how it goes in the real world!!! And here, I don't mean to say that we believe in hollywood endings, I say that we believe in romanticised sad love stories where in the end the antagonist is left hungry for love. Oh I just want to slap you on the face. 

What I mean to say is that, when you are in pain, you have more time to be with yourself and understand what is going on inside you; versus when you are hungry, you have more time, actually you spend more time, to be with the other and try to get something out from a source that does not belong to you. In other words you are paving a way that does not have a root in you.

Pain brings you back to life versus hunger brings you to places that you would never actually go. I prefer pain cause I prefer waking up -every time- from the illusive world that we live in.

Does loneliness scare you?

One’s loneliness cannot be experienced as any other feeling cannot be experienced by others. But, loneliness is very special in itself, because not many people are strong enough to go through the whole process since the road is very long to go by yourself, there are no guarantees. People are afraid of something that is connected to them from the core. It is only funny that we are born that way.

One of my teachers once told me, the first question a baby asks to himself is: “Am I safe in this world?” So the main attachment to this world comes from the feeling of safety and it is determined through other people.

Well, we grow up and we do it rather painfully. Minor events in one’s life are the punches of life to make you stronger, to make you a better version, to make you more human, more feminine, more masculine, makes you whatever you have decided to be when you chose the red pill.

Being yourself is the most painful thing one can go through and that is why loneliness is almost impossible to be understood by others. It seems like you are the cause of your own pain, it looks like that from afar. You pay the highest prices for this and it makes you MORE…

Now admit to yourself, are you scared?

The difference between life beating you up and you beating yourself is that when life beats you, it is for you to be perfect, it is a support, you can either choose to be pushed by it or lie down on the floor and take the punches; when you beat yourself up you simply feel smaller. You know the difference!

“This is your life and it is ending one minute at a time. If this is your fight, you have to fight.” ~ Fight Club

The end is the beginning

How do you define your boundaries and your limits of freedom, considering that even the most liberating ideologies have constraints?

Human beings are defined by the structures they are surrounded with; their thoughts, bodies, culture and well, the earth, since beyond the atmosphere is no place for a human to survive, yet.

What is more, the limit of your freedom ends when not only the physical boundaries of another person begins but also, more astonishingly, when the psychological boundaries of another begins.
I find this surprising because human psychology is more solid than matter, more tough than the human body and indistinguishable by those who do not know how to see what they look at.

Only "I" can tell you where you should stop! The limits of your freedom end when the boundaries of another begins. Know them well! 

A Moment of Darkness

Most probably you have seen many movies in which people completely loose control and turn into psychopaths. While watching the movie, you felt shocked and stress hormones rushed through your body. But, because the experiencer was not you, your prefrontal cortex, that is the reasoning part of your brain, was activated and you judged the event as being catastrophic. You did not want to imagine yourself in a psychopath's shoes because empathy means activating what's inside his mind, inside yours.

Here is a question just for you: Did you ever find yourself in a situation that you would never imagine yourself being in? In fact, life is all about moments like those. Why? Because if you predict everything that is going to happen in your life, there is no room for transformation and change.
Do not mistake these two words as intangible entities, they are very real if you choose to experience your emotions in a broader spectrum.

Here's the thing, if your decision is to experience life in the fullest sense, you are going to have to experience moments of darkness, and lots of it. But it is no big deal. Think about how refreshing it feels afterwards. You are not the same person anymore. With this perspective no one around you is the same. It is like entering into a different dimension.

Wellcome! 

Being Naked in the Eye of the Observer

If your perception towards the same person changes over time, what do you consider as real, where is your anchor point based?
-In this writing, I consider real as a stable view of the same entity over time. I know that it is impossible but bear with me for a second!-

Do you consider yourself to be one of those people that makes "correct" observations -judgements- of the people around you? Then how do you come to one specific conclusion, considering that your judgement changes over time, because your perception over time, even the things that you consider as solid aspects of your self such as your senses -probably the most unreliable aspects by the way- perceive differently at different times?

I have always have had a gut feeling that, when I meet someone, or see them for the first time or even hear about them for the first time, I have an instant rush of activity - if it is a rush, it has to occur in the brain and the feeling is like an hormonal -neuroendocrinal- change in my system- Possibly, I am not the only person experiencing this high pitch that later turns into stream of words. I also believe that this rush always tells me about the real aspects of the person that I have observed.

There are also instances where I am proven wrong! And I say to myself: "Now how is this possible, I am never wrong!" -Notice the exclamation point, no questions asked-

The reason for my deflected thought is that, obviously I was deprived of certain experiences and I have tuned my perception to what I want to see rather than what there actually is. -A bias or possibly expectation priming?-

What is my cure?

Well, the meaning of existence for me is what I become after processing the information I get whether it is knowledge based or experience based -Every breath you take changes you, let alone what you experience or learn-

Now, if you think that you can fool someone after the physiological response that you have created in their system, you are mistaken! Because you are naked in the eye of the observer.

Of course one might ask: Are we merely making attributions?
In that case, is anything real?